I'm so confused!

[Txmom42]

My son is Infantry, based at Fort Lewis. He is scheduled to deploy on October 6th. He just finished basic in August. I have concerns and worries too numerous to mention except for this one.

He wanted to come home for a short 4 day leave. His sargeants kept leading him on and telling him he could go this day, then that day. Finally, they gave him what he thought was a solid date so he bought a ticket. Now they say he can't have a leave at all. Apparently the rest of his unit had leave before he arrived. I don't have a problem if they don't want him to take a leave, I totally understand. What I don't understand is why they would string him along for so long and make him think it's OK to buy a ticket. I guess it's just a hard lesson learned. You don't do anything until you have it in writing. If I had known he didn't have it in writing I wouldn't have even made the reservations. Now I have a very upset son, his fiance' is upset, his siblings are upset, and mama has to be strong and clean up the mess. I may be wandering a little in my writing, I guess I just need to vent. I said they may be worried that it will mess with his head to come home so close to deployment, but they messed with it even more telling him he could then taking it away.

[MSG Glenn]

It's too bad he was promised that & bought a ticket. Can he get a refund? He should be able to get something, maybe not the whole amount.

Is he in a Stryker Brigade? My boy took Stryker training at Ft. Lewis in case they start using them in his unit.

[Txmom42]

I don't know for sure. He's only been there a month or so. He's in the 4th battalion and past that it's all a blur. I'm not up on military-ese. It took me months to figure out what rip school was. I think they have spent all their time just getting ready to deploy. I do know he likes Ft. Lewis. It was welcome relief after basic in Georgia.

[Nightflyer]

I don't know for sure. He's only been there a month or so. He's in the 4th battalion and past that it's all a blur. I'm not up on military-ese. It took me months to figure out what rip school was. I think they have spent all their time just getting ready to deploy. I do know he likes Ft. Lewis. It was welcome relief after basic in Georgia.

Stuff happens.....sometimes it's best to let it flow and wait till the last minute....Army.. hurry up and wait.....Welcome. Mom. It will be alright.....


Nightflyer.

[stsnydersmom]

hello. I can understand your frustration. My son joined the army in June 2007, and turning blue ceremony is Oct. 12. He is at Ft. Benning, Ga in Ait training. He will come home Oct 12, scheduled anyways, for 2 weeks, then he goes to Ft. Lewis in Washington to be deployed in February. He turned 18 during his mid cycle leave. So, reading your story, well, honestly, scares the heck out of me. Can they really deny his leave even tho he is already contacted us and said he's good to come home??? He already has his deployment papers to Irac in February. When did you find out your son could not come home? I have already contacted his recruiting sgt. He can not tell me anything until Seth comes home and he see's his papers. As a mom, honestly, I'm scared. I dont really have anyone to talk to about this. as a mother, honestly, I'm scared. But also have great pride in my son, if that is at all possible, because first and foremost I'm a mom. no one I talk to can understand that. This is what he has wanted since like 6th grade. My husband and I had to sign for him to join. Hardest decition of my life. He was 17 when he left, and just turned 18. You are the only person I have contacted, but I am so frustrated I did not no where else to turn but to another soldiers mother. I'd like to know if you went to his ceremony, and then he was denied leave. I, truely, understand your frustration/heartache. I'm scared now. My son is 18. I believe that there should be some sort of extended period for soildiers just out of training to be deployed. I'm scared, well ****less. He is a Stryker, 119th Bn. I dont think 8 months is enough training to be sent out into the middle of this war. I dont know where else to turn. I'm scared. My son is strong, brave, smart, and well, fearless. He wants this, did your son? I honestly think they (we) are fighting a war we will never win. Have any input for me? Am I making any sense? I hope you have the strenght and love and hope your son needs to hear, weither u believe it or not. Family is everything, no matter what the military want them to believe. I support my son, regardless of my opinion, because that only makes him stronger. Thanks for listining. Good Luck, and I wish you and your son the best.

[Txmom42]

Ok, I have tried to reply two times and now I am out of time. I will get on this afternoon and put most of your fears to rest. It will be OK.:)

[Txmom42]

Let's see how this goes tonight. You probably don't have anything to worry about. If he already has in writing that he has leave then we most likely will. Matthew did not have anything in writing, they just kept telling him they would try to work it in to the training schedule. I would rather have him fully trained and know what he's doing than here. He was supposed to go into airborne training after AIT but decided he wanted to wait until he had some experience and rank. It slowed down his arrival at his new post and by the time he got there, everyone else had already been on leave. He is 21 almost 22, but it doesn't mean I worry about him any less. I try not to worry. My theory is that there is no sense worrying about things I have no control over. I trust God that things will come out alright. It's hard to do sometimes. He's my first one to leave the nest. But I do think I worried more when he was here and it was 2 in the morning and not home and not answering his cell.

I know exactly what it's like signing that form when they are 17. My daughter was 17 when I signed hers. She ended up not going, I am so glad. It would do me in that have 2 over there.

Have a great time at the Turning Blue ceremony. I didn't get to go due to conflicts with other children. His two best friends went. They got there late and missed the whole thing, but they still had fun hanging out all weekend. We went to Family Weekend. We had a lot of fun. It was amazing to see the changes he was going through. I was so proud when I saw him in his uniform. I just couldn't get over it.

We do support them because that's what mom's do. When he calls and has had a let down, or a bad day, or is a little homesick, I tell him to suck it up, be Army strong and tomorrow will be a better day. Then I hang up and cry a few tears. I hope this helps. He's fine, he's going to be home on leave soon, and you will be amazed when you see him. If you don't have your reservations for Turning Blue, you better get them soon. Columbus fills up fast!

[kmullins]

you dont get anything in the army unless you recieve it in writing! remeber that. they schedual dates long in advance for leaves and deployments. they will have lots of training to due before being deployed, and you dont wnat your son to miss a second of that. he will get a leave somewhere in the middle of his deployment where he can come home, or go wherever he wants. so make plans for that. good luck to your boys!

[Txmom42]

Thanks. The more I had time to think about it over the weekend, the more I came to those same conclusions. I was having a hard time understanding why they would let him go so close to deployment anyway. I would rather have him trained to do his job and be safe, than come home. Not only that, I think it would have made it even harder for him to go, and me to let go.

I am worried though. Because of his anger and his homesickness, he has lost sight of why he signed on in the first place. I am hoping his leaders will see that and help him talk it out, (or run it out of him).

[Txmom42]

How soon will he have an address where I can start sending him care packages? He's already asking for things and I can't get them to Ft. Lewis by Friday.